Does it really help to talk about your feelings?
Talking to others about our feelings has a therapeutic effect
Last update: 10 August, 2017
Every now and then we tend to hide our feelings in the presence of others. We are ashamed to acknowledge that we are experiencing feelings that we consider negative because we believe - wrongly - that this makes us weak in the eyes of others. We want to be emotionally strong, not let anything disturb us and give the impression of being a “mature and rational person”.
Of course, it's wonderful when we practice thinking rationally and trying to become a little more mature every day. This is great for ourselves at first because it will enable us to say goodbye to much of the unnecessary. It is also a fact that our relationships with our fellow human beings improve because if we don't dramatize events, know how to handle our emotions appropriately, and act prudently, it will certainly affect those around us.
But that's not to say that our feelings are not human. In the course of our lives, we inevitably feel unhappy, anxious, or irascible more often than we would like. Since that is natural, the best we can do is to see this as normal as well, not to hide and to practice self-acceptance. But we should always do that too to a reasonable extent to do. While talking to others about our feelings has a therapeutic effect, we shouldn't do it excessively, as it can have the opposite effect.
Why is it good for us to talk about our feelings?
Regardless of whether it is about negative or positive feelings, it is always good for us to share them with others.
- In case of positive feelingsbecause they are so still amplify, can be celebrated and create a great time. Everyone likes to tell their partner they've been promoted or otherwise successful, don't they?
- On the other hand, we also have different reasons why we choose ours negative feelings should share with others. The main reason is that it avoids escaping the feeling and makes it more likely that we will Take responsibility for finding a solution to this negative feelingwhen we talk about it. When we express an emotion, it usually entails it loses intensity. Once we talk about it, we can understand the situation that made this feeling view from a different, often less black-and-white perspective.
If we try to erase the feeling as if it was written on paper with a pencil, all we can do is make that feeling even stronger. We say to ourselves that “we shouldn't feel like this” and this requirement on ourselves increases the pressure. The consequence of this is that our fear and discomfort increase, which in turn makes the feeling even more intense.
As soon as we share our feelings with someone, we accept this feeling and give it a space in our body. In this way we decrease the intensity of this emotion.
When we talk about our feelings, it also improves our relationships. To allow someone else to share in our emotions shows our appreciation and affection for this person and makes them feel that they are being considered.
Two heads always think better than one what should mean that it is probably easier for two to find a solution to the problem. Sometimes we feel so depressed that we cannot see what others are able to recognize with ease.
When should I talk to others about my feelings?
Every time you feel a burden inside you, a dark cloud hovers over you that makes it impossible for you to think clearly, let alone act effectively, it is appropriate to share yourself. You can confide in your best friend, your parents, or a psychologist. No matter who you choose, you should definitely not deal with major problems on your own.
There are times when it is very difficult to talk about your feelings. But we should be brave, leave our shame behind, and make the decision to just do it.
For example, if our partner does something that we dislike, it would be more appropriate to tell him how we are feeling rather than keeping silent and swallowing it. If we don't, eventually the barrel will overflow and our way of communicating will not be appropriate.
You should always start by taking responsibility for your feelings. Because of this, your first sentence should be: "I feel myself…", followed by your reasons for these feelings, and you should always end the conversation on a positive note and with mutual acceptance.
We can also share our emotions with people unrelated to the problem, such as with a friend. He will give us his opinion and help us to find a solution. In no case should you criticize others, because otherwise you will achieve exactly the opposite of what you want: Your negativity will become even greater.
Always express your feelings when you can. You are human and it is normal to feel emotions. We all do. Avoiding talking about them doesn't make you a stronger person; it does just the opposite, as it will only make you more anxious about possible rejection.
Always remember that it is not only good for you to talk about your problems and emotions, But also for those around you, because you give your fellow human beings the feeling that you trust them, and that strengthens the bond with them.
It's never too late to give our feelings a chance
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