Why does sperm flow when kissing

Help - am I pregnant now?

Especially for very young women, it is usually a shock when they suspect that they could be pregnant. First of all, it is important to calm down as much as possible and consider how likely it is that a pregnancy really is.

Short version:

  • Pregnancy is only possible in the days around ovulation - the fertile days.
  • Pregnancy after intercourse without contraception or an unsuccessful coitus interruptus is very likely.
  • Kissing, petting without sperm contact, oral or anal sex do not lead to pregnancy.
  • The morning-after pill can be taken up to 72 hours after unprotected sex to prevent pregnancy.
  • A pregnancy test can be done at least 2 days before your next period.

What days can you get pregnant?

You can only get pregnant if a male sperm cell meets a female egg cell. In order for this to happen, the sperm cells contained in the ejaculate must ascend via the vagina through the uterus until they finally reach the fallopian tube.

When are the fertile days?

A woman can only get pregnant in the days around ovulation, known as the fertile days. This point in time is roughly in the middle of the menstrual cycle. For many women, however, it is very difficult to estimate when exactly these days are - for this, their own menstrual cycle must be observed and noted very closely over a certain period of time. This is known as the calendar method. The calendar method can be used both for contraception and, conversely, for planning children.

However, the calendar method is not particularly safe as a contraceptive. If you do not want to get pregnant, you should therefore not rely on ovulation not taking place, but always use a contraceptive.

Sperm can survive in the female genital tract for up to five days and "wait" for ovulation. The egg cell can be fertilized for about 24 hours after ovulation. Therefore, a woman can get pregnant for around five to six days each month.

++ More about ovulation and fertilization ++

Ultimately, one sperm cell is enough to conceive a child, but the lower the sperm count, the less likely it will be fertilization. However, pregnancy can never be completely ruled out, even if the amount of sperm is very small.

It is of crucial importance for conception that the sperm is "fresh", i.e. still liquid. The more this is dried, the "harmless" it becomes. Dry sperm - such as an old stain on the sheet or underpants - cannot lead to fertilization.

How can you get pregnant?

In order for a pregnancy to occur, a living sperm cell must meet an egg cell. This is only possible for a short time in a woman's monthly cycle. If you are not sure what phase of your cycle you are in, you should be extra careful!

Sexual intercourse

Most likely you can get pregnant e.g. through

  • Sexual intercourse without contraceptive protection
  • Sexual intercourse with a broken condom
  • Sexual intercourse in the case of unsuccessful coitus interruptus

Less possible, but not excluded, pregnancy is e.g.

  • Forgotten pill
  • Vomiting or severe diarrhea in the first four hours after taking the pill with otherwise unprotected intercourse


Petting can also lead to pregnancy under certain circumstances, although overall this is less likely than through sexual intercourse.

It can be "dangerous", for example, if fresh sperm gets into the vagina by inserting it with a finger - in this case one could theoretically get pregnant.

Less possible, but not ruled out, pregnancy can result from

  • "Sit on it" on fresh sperm, which then gets into the vagina
  • Body contact with the ejaculation through material barriers such as panties or underpants; This is also how the sperm can theoretically get into the vagina.

Not likely is pregnancy when petting in the shower, bathtub, swimming pool, lake or sea - as long as no fresh sperm gets into the vagina.

What does not lead to pregnancy?

  • Kissing (also French kissing)
  • Unclothed lying next to each other
  • Petting without contact with semen
  • Contact with dried up semen
  • Oral sex (even if sperm is ingested or swallowed in the mouth)
  • Anal sex (provided that semen does not flow out of the anus and enter the vagina in this way)

What should I do if sperm cells may have gotten into the vagina?

In the event of unsuccessful attempts at contraception (coitus interruptus, torn or slipped condom, forgotten pill) or if semen was brought in with your finger, you should first try to calm yourself down as much as possible and keep a cool head. Once you have made a note of the regular days, you can first use the calendar method to check whether sexual intercourse took place during the "dangerous time". However, it is very difficult to make a reliable statement in this way.

If there is a possibility of pregnancy or if you are very unsure, it is best to consult a doctor. He or she can estimate the likelihood of pregnancy and, if necessary, advise on the morning-after pill. This allows you to catch up on contraception after unprotected sexual intercourse by preventing ovulation that has not yet taken place. There is also an over-the-counter morning-after pill available at any pharmacy. So that it can fulfill its purpose, the morning-after pill must be taken as soon as possible, but no later than 72 hours after sexual intercourse.

++ More about the morning-after pill ++

When is the earliest possible time to take a pregnancy test?

A pregnancy test can be carried out two days before the next expected period at the earliest. A control test - two to three weeks after unprotected contact - can be useful, as ovulation can sometimes be postponed.

+++ More about pregnancy test +++

What can indicate pregnancy?

There are different physical signs that can indicate pregnancy. Some are fairly likely to be pregnant, others are more unsure and may have other causes.

The following are possible signs of pregnancy:

  • Missing your period
  • Nausea, morning vomiting, pulling pain in the lower abdomen - about four weeks after unprotected sexual contact
  • Circulatory disorders - around four to six weeks after unprotected contact
  • Swelling and pain in the breasts - about eight weeks after sexual contact
  • Aversion or cravings for certain foods

A pregnancy can ultimately be determined with certainty by an ultrasound examination by the doctor.

+++ More on the topic: Signs of pregnancy +++

What can you do if you are accidentally pregnant?

First, a visit to the gynecologist should confirm an intact pregnancy. The examination can also take place in some counseling centers. If you are actually pregnant, the most important thing is to stay calm and talk to someone you trust.

Every woman should answer the following questions for herself:

  • Do I want a child in my current situation?
  • Can I currently imagine raising a child? Am I able to do this? What requirements do I need for this?
  • What options do I have to realize my life plan with a child?
  • Would I get support from those around me?
  • Could I deal with aborting the child? Would I regret it later?

It is important to first and foremost listen to your own needs, they should always be in the foreground when making a decision. Of course, the woman should also seek advice and support from the child’s father, a good friend, the parents or another person of trust - but the decision should ultimately lie with the woman herself.

If the desire to have an abortion is in the foreground, the woman should find out more about it in advance. A conversation with the gynecologist or at a counseling center can clarify important questions, such as

  • the legal situation in the event of a termination
  • the medical options in the event of a termination
  • Advice and support for the time after a termination
  • possible financial support in the event of a demolition
  • Alternatives to a termination

+++ More on the topic: Abortion +++

How do my parents react to an unwanted pregnancy?

If an unintentional pregnancy occurs, most teenagers are afraid to tell their parents about it. Most of the time, they also believe that they cannot come to them with this problem. Young people then often expect to be thrown out, verbally abused or left alone. Perhaps such statements were made in conversations that took place when the subject of pregnancy was still mere theory.

One should bear in mind, however, that such conversations can often turn out very differently if they are conducted against a real background.

Parents may not be happy to become grandparents at first, especially if their own children are young. First of all, "shock" and disappointment can prevail. After all, they have to make some changes to the ideas they have about the future of their children.

Very often, however, after the first few minutes of shock, parents react completely differently than one would have expected - you can talk to them, they are open and ready to offer their help. Sometimes there is even the possibility of having and raising the child under the supervision of one's own parents.

In some cases, however, parents are pushing for an abortion. It is important to know that the final decision is always made by the girl herself - she cannot be forced to do so. There is also help from the government for girls in such situations. You can find out more at the advice centers.

An unwanted pregnancy should definitely not be a reason to despair.

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Dr. Britta Bürger
Editorial editing:
Dr. med. Kerstin Lehermayr

Updated on:

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