Are you proud of your family
Show your child how proud you are of them!
Pay attention to social and emotional skills
Sometimes we parents tend to be particularly proud of our child's achievements: when they learn to ride a bike, perform at the music school's concerts, or when they get good grades in school. But we should also turn our attention to his social and emotional abilities. Because they are almost an even bigger reason to be proud! And our recognition supports our child in developing these skills even further. 9 moments to show your child how proud you are of them:
The right moment: Your twelve-month-old baby is sitting in his high chair at the table and enjoying a pancake that you cut into small pieces. Suddenly it looks at you happily, takes a piece of the treat and wants to feed you with it.
How to show your child how proud you are: Visibly enjoy your baby's gift from the heart: “Oh, that's nice of you! Hm, it tastes really good! Thank you for giving me something! "If your child is delighted and wants to put the rest of the pancake in your mouth, you should of course not offend it. You can say:" We'll just take turns: one always get you, one me! "
2. When it stands up for itself
The right moment: "Well, I think a fairy pony with a mane to do your hair is stupid, that's totally boring!" Your older daughter sounds condescendingly when her little sister at the table talks about her birthday wish. "But I am not you! I am me! " the little one vigorously clarifies - and the expression on her face makes it clear that the discussion is over for her.
How to show your child how proud you are: Encourage your daughter in her gut feeling: “That's right, Emily! Everyone likes different things - Paula prefers Lego, you prefer the castle. Because Paula is Paula and you are you! "And to the address of the older daughter:" We are all different, even if we are a family. And that's really good, because otherwise it would actually be boring! "
3. When it comforts another child
The right moment: When you pick them up from kindergarten, you hear how your three-year-old son comforts a boy in the outdoor area who has just fallen, scratched his knee and is crying.
How to show your child how proud you are: Wait until the situation has resolved, until the boy is comforted or has been provided with plasters or an ice pack by the teacher. On the way home you can say: “I was really happy how dearly you comforted Jonah! It did him good that you went straight to him. Because when you cry, you want help quickly! "
The positive effect of this recognition is reinforced if you - in the presence of your child, of course - express how proud you are to relatives or your partner: "Emil likes to help other children, he does it really well!" Of course, this does not only apply for this situation, but for all moments when you are happy about your child's behavior!
The right moment: You are in the outdoor pool. Your four-year-old son plays with other children in the shallow children's paddling pool. You watch relaxed. Suddenly you become aware because an older man joins the children. Is he the grandfather of a child? He goes up to your son and speaks to him. To be on the safe side, you get up immediately and go there. As you get closer, you hear your son saying aloud to the man who has now grabbed his shoulder: “Get out of here! Leave me alone!"
How to show your child how proud you are: Regardless of whether the man "just" had no feeling for the right distance from a strange child, or whether he actually had bad intentions: Your son reacted perfectly! He noticed the man's aggressive nature immediately and resisted. Play down the behavior of the stranger, but emphatically praise your child: "The man was not allowed to take your arm! It was great how you fended him off! That was exactly right!"
5. When it's caring
The right moment: Your nine-year-old daughter has a visitor. Her school friend complains that he doesn't understand the math homework at all. On the spur of the moment your daughter picks up her maths stuff and says: "Look, you have to do the math here, and then you just do ..." Although your daughter explains the calculation method completely differently and apparently less skillfully than you would do it yourself The penny seems to be falling at the friend's - his face brightens.
How to show your child how proud you are: “I was delighted with how patiently you showed Tom math. I think he really got it now. Sometimes children can explain things better than adults, they find the right words. "
The right moment: You want to quickly mop the floors before you have to go again. Your four-year-old son asks: “May I have the squeegee too?” Perhaps you're now thinking reflexively: Don't, it'll take longer and it won't be really clean. But your child's offer of help is something very valuable, and you you shouldn't turn it down, otherwise in a few years you might get angry that your son never thinks about helping out with the house.
How to show your child how proud you are: Sure, it will take longer now and you will probably not be entirely satisfied with the cleaning result. Jump over your shadow anyway: “Oh, it would be great if you could help. Look, you always pull lanes straight, one next to the other! "Explicitly appreciate your child's wonderful offer:" I'm really happy that you helped me. So I didn't have to do everything alone! "
No matter what activity your child helps you with: never improve the result in their presence, but if necessary wait until you are alone! A child is frustrated when we adults - no matter how hard they try - always demonstrate that we can do everything better.
7. When they share their toys
The right moment: Your four-year-old daughter has a visitor and the friend would like to play with her new Rapunzel Barbie. You actually already know what's to come: your daughter will definitely not give out the new doll. To your surprise, however, she only hesitates for a moment, and then holds the doll out to her friend with obvious defiance.
How to show your child how proud you are: If a child manages to share something, although it is very difficult for him to do so, it is an occasion for pride - and kudos. Because it is a great achievement for a small child to overcome themselves a little and to empathize with the wish of their playmate. And to understand that playing together is only fun if you give something up or take turns.
8. If it holds its own
The right moment: Perhaps you have been watching worried for a long time as your daughter constantly gives in to jostling on the slide in the playground, apparently lets herself go to everything in the Kiga, and hardly ever defends herself. Or maybe your son has had a "wrong friend" for months, who orders him around and is sometimes even aggressive, without your being able to talk him out of the boy.
When you arrive at the kindergarten one day to pick it up, your daughter is shouting: “Joey, leave me alone!” And actually drives away the biggest bully in the group. Or your son suddenly tells you at home: “I told Tim that I was I'm no longer his friend. He always just wants to determine. That's stupid! "
How to show your child how proud you are: Of course, you shouldn't raise your child to be violent. But if they struggle against someone who has attacked them many times, it is a sign of healthy self-esteem. Self-defense is allowed - and sometimes the only stop signal that assaulting children understand.
But even if your child realizes that their buddy is not doing them well, this is an important learning experience that you cannot do for them and that sometimes takes time. If the offspring manages (often only after a few months) to break away from a wrong friend, you can of course be proud of them! Now don't say: "I told you right away, he doesn't behave normally!", But: "I think you're right: Tim really doesn't behave like a real friend."
9. When it finds its own solution
The right moment: Your sons play with Lego blocks. One of them needs one last transparent window block for his work, but his brother does not pull it out. Now he offers the reluctant sibling a barter: "If you give me the window, you can have one more figure than me."
How to show your child how proud you are: It is a great achievement in terms of social behavior when a child thinks about a barter: they perceive the needs of their counterpart, weigh them against their own and try to find a solution that makes both happy. If your child does not come up with such a conflict solution of his own accord, you can also suggest it (but without imposing it on the opponent).
If the two of them manage the deal, show how proud you are: “It's great that you had the idea to swap, Jonah! And for you, Joshua, it wasn't easy to do without the building block, I know. I really like the way you guys solved that! "
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